That Ain't Torture!

Waterboarding. Sounds a bit like something you do while on vacation, no? "Guess what kids? We're going waterboarding today!"

Despite being clearly illegal and regarded as torture during the Vietnam War, waterboarding was deemed a-okay by the Bush folks. "It's not torture," they said, "it's enhanced interrogation!" This is where I get sick, get off the ride and try to keep my lunch from coming back up. The term "enhanced interrogation"is what George Carlin would simply call a grotesque evasion of the truth. It's a fantastic example of euphemistic language used to distort reality. It's simply meant to sound loads better and shed all the negative connotations rightfully associated with "torture." Does not even the word "enhanced" suggests some sort of improvement? -- "Tired of plain old interrogation? Are you not getting the answers you want to hear? Try new and improved ENHANCED Interrogation! Guaranteed results in only 183 applications!" The use of this term is undeniably bogus. It does nothing but present the idea that if we call it something different, it is something different. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Anything beyond regular interrogation violates human rights and equates to torture, that's the simple truth.

Of course, maybe you're not buying all this liberal bullshit...maybe you think waterboarding is just swell because it's (allegedly) getting us answers that save lives. Awesome. I get it. They're evil, we are good, etc. etc. We can waterboard infidels, they can waterboard our troops, and everyone is happy!

Oh...you didn't know about that? I'm sorry, I didn't realize. Yeah, it seems that engaging in an activity is paramount to endorsing it. So, if we waterboard them and say it isn't torture, they can do the same to us and make the same claim. If we say waterboarding isn't a war crime, we certainly have no cause to turn around and prosecute others for engaging in the same behaviors with our troops as the victims. So this is the question: Is war not dangerous, bloody and horrifying enough without deliberately causing controlled amounts of pain and/or panic to others? Sure, maybe the enemy will do these things anyhow, but at least we can seek proper retribution...at least we're saying it isn't right and it's not something we'll tolerate being done.

Anyhow, I suppose if you disagree and your son or daughter comes home from the War with tales of the horrors of being subject to tor...enhanced interrogation techniques, you can just pat him/her on the shoulder, smile and say, "Well, that's what you signed up for, want to go for a swim?"